Thoughts before marathon #8

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a ball of emotions. I am happy. I am scared. I am excited. I am nervous. I have been asked “How? you have done this so many times before!” but you know what? this time is different. To be honest, I had a lot of self doubt and self hate that I had to overcome throughout the course of the last 8 or 9 months. I lost my path. I felt passionless. I felt lost. Kinda crazy how running, or lack there of, can have that kind of effect on me.

So this training was much more than training for a marathon. This training has brought me back to my happy place. It was a long uphill battle, but I am getting back to where I wanted to be. After my stint of looking towards competing last year.. my legs were different. My whole life I had strong, muscular legs. This was the first time in my life that my legs were losing their strength and became quite soft. The combination of eating very little with overexercising had me lose a lot of muscle that I previously had. Anyway, you can see where my worries for this training kind of arose from. Could my legs take the beating they had, time and time again? I also had put on some fat mass that made things harder on my body. So a lot of self doubt came over me.

But something shifted about 3/4s of the way through this training. I learned to eat clean, eat well..like an athlete should. The 21 day fix helped LOADS with that.

So now I sit here, a belly FULL of butterflies thinking about how this time tomorrow I will be running my 8th marathon. I know I have the training under my fuel belt. I know I have done this before. Though I am slightly scared, I know this will all go well. Heck, maybe I will surprise myself.

I have had THE most supportive words spoken to me all week. I am truly grateful for the husband, family and friends I have been blessed with..online and offline! Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. Though I am a ball of nerves, I will get my head into the game once I step onto my float plane in an hour. I work best under pressure anyway ;).

Though I have no goal time in place, I have my strategy ready. I am not like most marathoners.. in fact I am a total weirdo. I more often than not, negative split my races. That is the plan again for this race, but if something goes wrong.. that is okay too. I just tend to preform best with a VERY slow start, with a super fast finish. This race was to “get back into it” not to Boston Qualify. So I am hoping to hit the half way point around 2:10 or 2:15. Then start picking up from there. We will see if the plan and pacing goes according to plan!

I will be hitting up the BMO Expo in a few hours and then going for dinner at one of my favourite places with some good online friends :). Joey Bentall is one of my FAVES. Cannot wait! Hello steak and potatoes, get in my bellehhh! Then to go through my nightly ritual of compression socks, hydration and Spirit of the Marathon. BY THE WAY, if you have not seen this documentary…STOP READING AND GO WATCH NOW!! It is so inspirational and I watch it before every full marathon that I race!

Alright. Time to get my game face on. Tomorrow I shall leave my nerves at home, and leave my soul and heart out there on that race course. I am ready for you Vancouver!

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PS. Butterflies just went SUPER crazy just now! eep! Also, check out that elevation for the first half ;). Sexy isn’t it!

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